Racoons, Foxes and Wolves!
by LazyxPixiexGirl
Summary: Two worlds meet the World of Naruto and the World of Twilight. Only few words can explain: chaos, cookies and random things. rated t just to be safe
1. Chapter 1

Author's note

**I'm so happy thats going to snow here!!!! Its funny my birthday is this Saturday and my mom was like, " what do you want for your birthday. You can have anything you want" **

**So I was like, "I want a Akatsuki cape and I want my Zetsu plushie back." I showed her what the cape looked like and she was like no, she said I can have anything I **

**want...seriously parents you can't live with them and well I'm not going to say the rest. Yea I feel so betrayed so I'm going to let Gaara give the disclaimer and other legal stuff. **

**Gaara: Lapushxwolfxgirl aka Haya don't own Twilight, Naruto or me. -hugs Haya- Why do you want to look like a Akatsuki?**

**Me: Because they have cool things plus me and Zetsu have history. -looks down-**

**Gaara: We'll talk about this later.**

* * *

It was another boring day in Konoha no missions for our favorite ninjas, Naruto.....was well being Naruto, Sasuke came back to Konoha for some reason who knows. Earlier doing that week when

Sasukecame back to Konoha he was surprised with the news that he had a sister...a half sister none the less guess his dad didn't tell no one about that. Sasuke was in the park with his "new sister"

talking and stuff when Gaara and Naruto popped out of nowhere spying on them to kill their boredom. "Hey Sasuke, Wha'cha doing and who is this super cute girl your with?!" Naruto screamed out

grinning at Haya, Gaara immediately noticing Haya, bowed and smiled at her. "H-hello...." He said swallowing hard as he blushed a little. Haya smiled at both of them, "I'm Haya, Sasuke's sister."

Naruto's eyes widen when he heard this, "How is that possible, isn't your whole family dead??!!" He said screaming and freaking out. "I'm his half sister, same dad different mom....for some reason he's

over protective." Haya said, Naruto smiled at her then sat beside her. Haya smiled at Gaara and blushed a little, "you must be the Kazekage for the Sand Village, pleased to meet you." He smiled and

put his head down moving his feet sheepishly. "Today is such a boring day, I got an idea what we can do!" Naruto said quickly standing up. "What if we were living in the 1950's, with gangsters, old

fashion cars, sock-hops and stuff like that. I got the idea from this movie I saw on t.v. the other night!" Naruto said. "You loser, that was like over 50 years ago, how are we going to do that." Sasuke

hissed at him, Haya and Gaara just stared at them making constant eye contact with each other in the process. Haya decided to break the argument up, "that is a good idea Naruto but how are we

going to do that? I mean we would need like a super powerful genjutsu or Lady Tsunade could pass a law to make this town a 1950's theme town...." Naruto grinned and nodded his head giving a

thumbs up, "you're a genius Haya, we could get Grandma to pass a law then use a genjutsu! Meet me back here in a hour! " He said as he skipped off happily humming. Gaara eye started twitching as

he watched the now super happy Naruto skip off happily, "and I thought he couldn't be more scarier." "She's not really going to say yes is she?" Haya asked looking Sasuke. Sasuke hunched his

shoulders for he didn't personally know Lady Tsunade but only from what he heard Orochimaru talk about.

About 10 minutes later Naruto stormed into the 5th Hokage's office huffing and puffing trying to catch his breath from running. "What do you want now

Naruto and no I'm not loaning you 20 bucks." She said rolling her eyes. "Shoot Aw man!" He said as he turned around about to walk out, when he instantly remembered his reason for barging in.

"Konoha is so boring, can you liven things things up, please." He said looking at her with puppy dog eyes. "What do you want me to do about it. Please don't do that you know I'm a sucker for the puppy

dog eyes." She said as she sighed rubbing her head. "Well I saw this movie the other night on t.v. and it was based on the 1950's and well." "Spit it out man!" "Can you turn this town into a 1950's

theme town!" He said in one breath." "Heck no, why would I do that?!" She glared at him as she yelled. "Well because you can gamble a lot since you like to gamble, no paperwork and I promise I

won't bother you anymore." Naruto said as he continued to look pitiful waiting for the answer. Tsunade thought about the idea for a few minutes and made her decision. "I'll do it!" She said as she

started writing up the decree to make a Konoha a 50's theme town, "Shizune will you please come in my office for a second." She said over the intercom and a few minutes later Shizune rushed into

the room almost tripping over a bowl of instant ramen that someone had accidently left on the floor. "So that's where that went to, I thought I had lost it. I'll cook it later" Naruto said as he picked the

bowl of ramen up off the floor and stuffed into his pocket. "Okay riight moving on." Tsunade said trying not to call Konoha's Insane Asylum on Naruto. "I want to you to make copies of this and post it

everywhere in Konoha and make sure everyone sees it." She said as she handed Shizune the decree, Shizune nodded and quickly looked over the decree then her eyes got wide at the insane law that

just has been passed. "Who's idea was this!" Shizune demanded looking at Lady Tsunade with a serious look. "Since Konoha is losing revenue because there's no ninja missions and stuff need to be

done, plus being a tourist attraction will be a good thing we need. It's so freaking dead around here." She said smiling as she placed her feet on the desk. "Now go and post that flyer!" She said punching

her fist in the air. Shizune couldn't argue with that, Konoha did need more revenue plus it was dead in that town since someone had to gamble the town's goverment money, she turned around and

started walking then suddenly tripped on a book. "What the hell!?" She said as she saw the book, "What the hell is New Moon? Who's book is this?!" Naruto quickly grabbed the book and ran out the

office before anyone could ask him about the book. -That was a close one, Bella is better off with Jacob than Edward- Naruto thought running back to the park to meet Haya and the others. Haya and

Gaara was staring into each others eyes blushing to Sasuke's dismay, suddenly Naruto appeared smiling at them. "I DID IT!!!" "Did what, pass preschool?" Sasuke said sarcastically rolling his eyes and

laughing a little at his joke. Haya smacked Sasuke behind his head, "that wasn't cool, be nice. That's good Naruto..um what's that book in your hands?" Haya said pointing to the book Naruto had in his

hand, "Umm its nothing." He quickly shoved the super huge book in his pocket.

* * *

**Haya: Wow this chapter is really short, oh well the next one is going to be longer Dattebayo!! **

**Naruto: Oi That's my line!!! RAMEN! -notices a bowl of ramen on the floor-**

**Gaara: Random, so anyway the next chapter is going to be posted soon providing that I'm not on my honeymoon with Haya.**

**Haya: honeymoon!? -faints-**

**Zetsu: -appears out of nowhere and looks on the floor at Haya- I'm not even going to ask, everyone who r&r will get free cookies....so... -pokes Haya with a stick-**

**Gaara: So later guys -shuts off the video camera-**

**-End Transition-**


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note

**Chatper 2 is officially up!!**

**I'm officially snowed in, seriously it comes to my knees and I'm only 5'4, man. And my mom don't get me started, usually Gaara would come in through my bedroom **

**window at night when everyone is sleep but this time he came to my house and formally introduced himself to my mom and step-dad. But the plus side is that **

**me and Gaara went outside and made a igloo, we couldn't use the snow because it was too soft so we used sand.**

**~flashback begins~**

**Gaara: -rings doorbell with a present in his hands-**

**Zetsu: -walks in- I hate to interupt this flashback but we got a story to get to -glares-**

**Me: Ugh fine buzzkill, I'll tell my story later..**

**Zetsu: Thank you, now on to the legel matter. **

**Me: -sighs- I do not own Naruto or Twilight, but I own myself -grins-**

* * *

"Well now what?" Gaara said as he looked at Naruto. "We need to get some 50's clothes! STAT!" Naruto said trying to cover the noticeably huge book in his pocket.

"Umm okay lets go shopping." Haya said grabbing Gaara's hand as she start running. Naruto and Sasuke followed behind them, they ran back into town to see the whole

town had had a huge transformation in just 10 minutes. "W-O-W." Haya mouth out staring in amazement at the newly transformed town, the gang walked passed Ichiraku

Ramen only todiscover it was a 50's dinner with a jukebox. "THIS IS SO AWESOME!!" Naruto screames out. They then walked into Wal-mart and separated going to different

isles but Gaara stayed glued to Haya's side, Sasuke pretending to be looking for clothes kept a close eye on the two. Naruto was busy humming as he looked through the pants

to find his size after searching and scouting he found what he was looking for a pair of worn tattered jeans with holes in the knees, he was going for the bad boy look. Haya noticed a long

pink skirt with a poodle on it and she squealed in delight when she saw it so she quickly picked it up holding it tight, she noticed the same one only it was black she added it to her

"collection", she then picked out the shirts, socks and quickly moved to the shoe department and began trying on sneakers and dressy church shoes. After 20 shoes, 15 didn't fit but

the other 5 she kept, Naruto was still trying to perfect his bad boy look for who knows what reason...Sasuke was to busybreaking his neck keeping a eye on his "sister" and her new friend

that he didn't notice the fangirls behind him drooling and secretly plotting to kidnap him. We'll check on Sasuke later moving on, Naruto was looking for a leather jacket,

why would he need a leather jacket its summer time!!! Naruto turned around because he thought he heard a voice yelling, "HELP THE CEILING IS TALKING TO ME!!!" Naruto

screamed running around in a circle like a crazy person, everyone in the store dropped their clothes to check on the orange clad ninja. "Naruto, shut up I'm the narrator and right

now only you can hear me..." "Ahhh its talking to me again, make it stop!!" The narrator scoffed and waited for him to cool down along with the people to leave so she can finish talking to him.

After a few crazy stares and glares the people left to go on about their business, one concerned mother had her cellphone in hand ready to call Konoha's Insane Asylum at anytime. "Listen Naruto,

there will be a party at the Konoha Inn tonight, you'll find out my identity later. Oh and seriously you need to stop screaming, people are looking and also you might want to check on Sasuke he's

about to be kidnapped...I heard he has feelings for you." Naruto looked up and started smiling a little, "he does, really?" "Yep, now go get him." "Thanks invisible narrator lady." He said as he got

up and ran to find Sasuke, the narrator laughed evilly at what she had started. "Maybe he can distract Sasuke. Now back to Konoha's Sweethearts." She laughed, Naruto finds Sasuke and

tackles him to the floor Naruto being on top, "Aw no you don't I'm on top." Sasuke said as he rolled them over and he was on top, the fangirls squealed at the NarutoxSasuke scene that had

just taken place a couple of the fangirls screamed out "KISS HIM, TAKE HIS CLOTHES OFF SHOW HIM WHO'S THE UKE!" Sasuke shrugged his shoulders and kissed Naruto in a

deep kiss completely distracted that he didn't notice his sister, Gaara, Ino, Kiba or anyone else taking pictures of him and Naruto. Sasuke then dragged Naruto in the

dressing room. The fangirls and Haya peeped under the door but to their dismay, they were sitting down in the dressing room playing cards. "Man that was a huge waste of time....I

thought they were going to do something else.." One fan girl said before walking off to finish looking at clothes. The fangirls that were peeping under the door ran off and went back to

their business , Haya walked up to Naruto and Sasuke and slapped them on the back of their heads, "What the hell!?" With everything that they needed the gang went to the check

out counter and then there was a complete silence...who was going to pay for all this stuff? Haya smiled then took out a credit card, "I'll pay for it, besides its not my credit card.."

Sasuke glared at her evilly, "alright who's is that?" "Its your dad's, i inherited from the Uchiha clan will along with the mansion.." "How can that be?" "Look buddy, your dad made

a secret will for his "secret children" thats all I know." She handed the clerk the card and continues to glare at Sasuke, "wow his own kids didn't get squat, I'm so sorry." She said

sarcastically as she laughed evilly and walked out the store leaving them to carry the bags. "Haya wait up!" Naruto yelled calling after her, she turned around and stopped walking.

"What is it Naruto?" He ran up to her and handed her the bags with her things in it. "Here's your things, what did you say to Sasuke he seems really mad right now?"

"Nothing..nothing at all." She smiled innocently at Naruto and continued walking. "Hey Haya, meet me at the gate entrance in about 30 minutes, okay?" "What for?"

She asked curiously, "I got another idea." Naruto said. "Okay I will. See ya Naruto-kun." She said as she ran off to go home. Naruto turned around to face Sasuke and Gaara,

"Hey guys meet me at the gate entrance in 30 minutes." With that Naruto ran off to his house to get changed. About 30 minutes later everyone was at the gate entrance in their new

clothes, waiting for Naruto to arrive, Naruto finally arrives with his hair slicked back wearing a leather jacket and a pair ripped jeans. "Oh my gosh!" Haya and Sasuke

said in union as their mouths dropped to the ground, Gaara just watched in curiosity. "What up guys, you ready for the trip?" "What trip?" Haya said in a

surprise tone. "Its a surprise, but its worth it." "He smiled with a thumbs up. "Heyyyyy." "Don't do that you're not the Fonz, Naruto." Haya said. "But I wanna be

cool." "Trust me you're already cool, don't change." Haya said patting Naruto on the back. Naruto nodded his head and smiled at Haya, "Thank you. Now lets go,

we'll be there in a few hours. We're going to the airport." "Since when does Konoha has a Airport and don't we need passports?!" Sasuke, Haya and Gaara asked in unison.."Since like

forever..where have you guys been and I already got them? Follow me." Naruto smiled as he led the motley crew through the town, after 10 minutes of walking they came to

the airport. It was super huge like those airports in LA. "How come no one told us about this place?" Sasuke said. "You never asked. Wait here I'll be right back."

Naruto ran to the check out desk and got 4 tickets then ran back to the gang. "I got our tickets, our flight leaves in 5 minutes." He hands everyone their ticket,

Gaara glares at the ticket. "Why am I going?" Gaara asked still glaring at the ticket. "Because its so obvious...Haya likes you and you like her..." Sasuke said grinning evilly at Haya for that smart remark

she made earlier that day." Gaara blushed and took Haya's hand in his looking her in the eye, "I-Is that true?" "I-it is." She stammered out blushing. He then got down on one knee still holding

her hand. "W-will..y-you...m-marry me?" The other people in the airport were obviously evasdropping and "Awed" at the sight that just had taken place. He blushed as she stuttered. "Sure, I'd love to."

Sasuke slapped his forehead now disgusted at the mess he had made. Naruto was long gone waiting in line to board the plane, "come on guys, get in line!" Haya and Gaara ran to get in line as

Sasuke slouched and slowly walked to the line. They then handed their tickets to the flight attendant and they went through the door leading into the airplane. Naruto made his way

inside the airplane and looked for his seat, "Here it is row A seat 2, Sasuke yours is seat 1." Naruto sat down then pointed to the empty chair next to him, Sasuke quickly sat

down and strapped himself in because he had a bad feeling about something. Haya and Gaara took their seat right behind the "new couple". "So how long before we get to our

destination?" Haya asked waiting for the plane to take off so she can torture Sasuke. "Umm about 10 hours, why?" Naruto said kinda confused. "Oh no reason." 'Good' Haya grinned evilly after hearing this.

* * *

**Me: So anyway as I was saying before Zetsu rudely interrupted me -glares daggers at Zetsu-**

**Zetsu: -sweatdrops- Well um now you can finish your flashback...just please don't use the hedge trimmers**

**Me: -smiles evily- So anyway...**

**~flashback begins again~**

**Gaara: -rings the doorbell with a present in his hands-**

**My mom: -rushes to the door and opens it- AHHHHH!!! -she says as sees Gaara-**

**Gaara: -looks at her in utter confusion- **

**My step-dad: -gets up from watching t.v. on the flat sceen in the family room and goes to the door- I heard you scream, whats up?**

**Me: -runs down the stairs and looks out the door, only to see Gaara- GAARA!!! OH MY GOSH!!**

**Gaara: H-happy Birthday H-haya....-he said looking at his feet sheepishly handing her the present-**

**Me: -tackle hugs him-**

**My mom and step-dad: AHEM! -clears their throat- Get inside this house, this instant and bring him with you.**

**Gaara: -grabs her hand and walks inside the house-**

**~The door shuts behind us, inside the house~**

**My mom: What the hell is wrong with you, you know you are not allowed to talk to boys!! -she said stomping her foot furiously-**

**Me: But he's the Kazekage and I love him....**

**My mom: I don't care, plus he's one of those gothic kids!! **

**Me: No he's not, he just don't sleep..much -smiles a little-**

**My mom: You know what you guys are doing is a sin, you are going to go to hell!**

**Me: We didn't do anything....we're innocent!**

**My step-dad: -looking at Gaara- How did you meet my daughter?!**

**Gaara: I met her a while ago when I was with my friend, after I seen her I was struck...**

**My step-dad: So you love her then? And how long have you too been like this?**

**Gaara: Yes sir and about 2 years.....**

**My step-dad: -hunched his shoulders- Fine with me, you can date her if you want to...**

**Gaara: -eyes widen and smiles- T-thank you sir!**

**My step-dad: Uh huh -walks back into the family room to watch t.v.-**

**Me: Dad said that me and Garra can talk, mom**

**My mom: -sighs- Okay fine, but -death glares at Gaara- if you hurt her I will....lets just say it won't be pretty -goes into the family room-**

**Me: Wow not only does she look like Tsunade she is evil as well...more eviler than Orochimaru -laughs a little-**

**~end flashback~**

**Me: So that's what happened**

**Zetsu: -snoring then suddenly wakes up- Huh wha...h-happen? **

**Me: Oi the birthday present Gaara got me was a chocker with a bat on it, well gotta go -chases Zetsu with the hedge trimmers-**

**-Pack of Wolves appear and start growling at Sasuke-**

**Sasuke: -sees the wolves and starts running- DON'T FORGET TO R&R!!!! AHHHH!!! **

**Naruto: -shuts the video camera off-**

**~End Transition~**


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note

**Hey Peoples, I'm back -grins like the Cheshire cat- I just want to say thank you for the reviews and rating, I just remembered I forgot to post a page as to what Haya looks like..I'll get right on it -sniff- without you guys I would lose my inspiration..i just wanna say thankies -gives cookies and muffins to everyone-**

**wow I just love this chapter its soo funny....I don't know why but I just can't stand Sasuke..I mean I'm not a Sasuke hater but he just get on my nerves sometimes lol. I can honestly say that Itachi is way cooler than Sasuke. **

**Sai: -looks into the camera at the cue card- Lapushxwolfxgirl aka Haya does not own none of the characters except herself**

**Me: who is paying for these cameras and photographers**

**Sai: not me thats for sure**

**Me: Why are you even here, Sai?**

**Sai: I was paid with...-runs off not finishing the sentence-**

* * *

"Ahoy maties, I'm Captain Jack Sparrow and I'll be your captain for today's flight!. Make sure you buckle up in case of a

ship..I mean plane wreck and in case of emergency oxygen masks are above your head. Our flight should take no more

than 10 hours. If you need anything my first m...I mean the flight attendants can and will get it for you. Also we have 4

unattended minors flying with us today and one of them is a lazy emo prick! Thanks for flying Konoha Air and have a good

day." The pilot turned the intercom system off and started the plane a few minutes later the plane took off and Naruto

was looking out the window bouncing up and down in his seat. "Hello kids, would you like anything to drink? We have

energy drinks, Sprite, Cranberry juice and water. Well if you get sleepy we also have caffeine pills, here's a menu." The

flight attendant hands Haya and Gaara a menu. "Cool, I'll take a energy drink, a cranberry juice, and a pack of caffeine

pills. Naruto shook his head and said, "no thank you." Sasuke had his eyes closed trying to figure out the bad feeling that

he didn't notice the flight attendant. Haya smiled at the attendant and attendant looked at Gaara. "Oh he'll have some

cranberry juice and water. He don't talk much for some reason" Haya smiled at the attendant, the attendant smiled back

shrugged her shoulders and walked in the back to get the things. "What's with all the caffeine do you do drugs?" He

asked eyeing her suspiciously. "No, I need to get back at Sasuke, tis all." She smiled innocently, the flight attendant came

back and handed Haya the things she requested, "that sure is a lot of caffeine you got there young lady." "Oh its for my

condition, I need caffeine to deal with my brother or else I'll go crazy." She continued to smile innocently at the attendant.

" Oh my, I'm so sorry, if there's anything I can get for you let me know." The attendant said then walked into the back.

"Wow, condition...that was cool" Gaara said as he watched Haya take the 2 caffeine pills and open the energy drink can

and chugged it down." "Wait for it...wait for it.." About 2 minutes later the caffeine finally kicked in and Haya cracked her

knuckles grinning evilly, Gaara put two of his fingers against Haya's neck and gasped as his eyes widen in shock. "Do you

feel okay? Your heart rate is sky high." "I'mgooddon'tworryaboutme." Haya said super fast smiling, Gaara tilted his

head to the side, "Excuse me?" "I'm good don't worry about me, I do this all the time." She said slower. After looking

around to make sure no one was watching she started kicking the back of Sasuke's seat SUPER HARD. "Hey Socks-gay, ha

ha I called you gay socks." "You little brat, quit it right now." Sasuke growled out. "Little? I'm 5 months older than you,

just because your taller and look older doesn't make you older." He growled even louder, Haya quickly stopped kicking the

chair as the nice flight attendant lady walked by to check on them. "She kept kicking me in my seat." Sasuke said

innocently to the attendant. The flight attendant looked at the row that Haya and Gaara was sitting in, they were fiercely

making out. "But she was just kicking me!!" Sasuke said practically screaming. "Aw young love, just like soaps on t.v.."

The attendant said smiling and sighing happily then she gave Sasuke a mean glare, Sasuke turned around in his seat to

see what his sister was up to. "Aw you guys are so cute. If you guys need anything I'll be in the back." The attendant said

to both Gaara and Haya, Gaara and blushed a bit as they continued kissing. The flight attendant walked back to the

break-room to gossip about what she saw to the other flight attendants. Sasuke rubbed his eyes and stared at his sister,

"b-but she was just kicking my seat, how did y-you?" As soon as the coast was clear Gaara and Haya broke the kiss and

gave each other a high five and Haya licked her tongue at her now angry/confused brother. "That was genius Gaara, I

would have never thought of that." Haya said smiling and sort of blushing. "T-thanks..." Gaara stutters out. "Whatever

you are plotting to do it isn't going to work?! " Sasuke said looking at Haya with a serious look. "Oh brother I know not of

which you speak of." Haya said as she shut her eyes and stayed quiet for what seemed like hours but was only 3

minutes. "What is wrong with you, why won't you answer my question?!" Sasuke asked furiously as his face turned red.

"Your hate's not strong enough...you're not stong enough. That's right, live in shame, run away, and live." Haya said in a

serious tone as she opened her eyes and glared at Sasuke. Sai popped out of no where with his trademark fake smile

and pointed in Sasuke's face. "I think what she meant to say was you lack pe..." Haya slapped her hand on Sai's mouth

before he could finish his sentence. "Shhhh, the FCC is listening to us. And besides if I knew what he lacked that would

be scandalous and I really don't wanna know." Haya said pointing to the television camera. Sasuke's eyes widened after

hearing what Haya and Sai had said and began to start hyperventilating and foaming at the mouth. Naruto looked over at

Sasuke, hunched his shoulders and went back to looking out the window and taking pictures of the scenery below the

plane. "Where did you get that from?" Gaara whispered in Haya's ear. "Itachi...." Haya said smiling. "So why are we

annoying Sasuke anyway?" Gaara asked. "Because, he made fun of me when I was on my period, he always drink the last

Dr. Pepper, used up all the hot water in the shower and constantly burns up everything he cooks." Haya says folding her

arms over her chest. "Ohh I see." Gaara said nodding his head. "Hey....what is a 'period'?" Gaara asked in a confused

voice. Naruto heard Gaara's question and turned around in his seat to face Gaara and Haya. "Sakura always told me that

it means for me to shut up and leave her alone." Haya snickered at Naruto's remark. "Umm I think this might help.." Haya

blushes a little bit and hands Naruto a book about girls. Naruto takes the book and sits back in his seat, after 15 minutes

of reading about girls. "Ewwwwwww, I don't believe it...there's a spider on the book!!" Naruto said wide eyed as he

tossed the book to Gaara. Gaara looks at the spider on the book and kills it with his sand. "So what did you find out?"

Haya asked Naruto grinning. "Uhh I didn't understand what it was talking about..." Naruto said scratching the back of his

head. Gaara opened the book and began reading it after 1 hour of quietly reading the book, he slowly and calmly set the

book down. Naruto, Sasuke and Haya were watching 'Showdown in Little Tokyo' and Sai was in the row across from them

drawing in a tablet, Haya noticed Gaara was looking troubled after he read the book. "What's wrong Gaara." Haya asked.

"I don't understand nor can I make out what I just read.." Gaara said in a defeated tone. "I still don't understand what a

period is!" Naruto spoke up while looking at the movie. Sai over heard the conversation, closed his drawing tablet and

looked over at us. "A period is when a girl becomes a evil vampire with mood swings and cravings for 7 days." Sai smiles

at us, opens the tablet back up and continues his drawing. "So thats it!? I wish that book could have said that instead of

having us wonder!" Naruto ranted, Sasuke was to busy suffering from shell shock to say anything about the subject.

"Why is Sai here anyway?" Haya asked. Sai quickly looked up from his tablet, "because I wanna be cool also and I'm

hungry..." The flight attendant returned after hearing Sai say he was hungry, "Does anyone want something?". "A

pepperoni pizza with chocolate syrup!!" Haya and Naruto shouted out, Gaara just looked at them in shock at the weird

order. The attendent smiled and looked at Sai, "What about you son?" "I'll just share the pizza with them." He said

pointing across the row. The flight attendant went in the back and 15 minutes later she returned with the pizza and a

bottle of chocolate syrup. "What's wrong him?" The flight attendant asked looking at Sasuke, he was in fetal position

sucking his thumb trying to find his happy place. Everyone just shrugged their shoulders not really caring about Sasuke as

they went back to eating. "Attention passengers this is your Captain speaking, we seem to have a problem. It looks like

Captain Jones (A/N: Davy Jones btw lol) of the Mist Village Airport is trying to steal our booty...I mean in flight movie

snacks...everyone remain calm!!!" The passengers started freaking out and one passenger got up and started running

down the isle screaming. 'Wow this day just keeps getting weirder and weirder.' Haya thought to herself. "Hey Naruto,

wouldn't my mom notice that I'm not home?" Haya asked a little concerned. "Nope already taken care of!" Meanwhile in

Konoha at the the formal Uchiha mansion now the Suzuki mansion aka Haya's house. "Haya dear would you make dinner,

wash the clothes and while your at it make me some popcorn." Haya's mom said from her bedroom. "Ugh, I could see why

Haya don't like to be here." Zetsu groaned dressed up as Haya, instead of using a jutsu to look like Haya he was

just given a wig, skin bleaching creme, skin bronzer, her clothes and some hazel contacts. "Its hard to believe that her

mom don't recognize her own daughter, stupid Naruto..stupid bet." Zetsu said kicking the trash can in the kitchen trying

to ignore the television camera.

* * *

**Gaara: So where we taking a plane to anyway? And what kind of history do you have with Zetsu?**

**Haya: -looks down- I used to be a Akatsuki member, Itachi kidnapped me, me and Zetsu became good friends**

**Sai: So...What was it like since he is part plant? **

**Me: O.o Umm I don't know -confused by the question-**

**Naruto: -looks into the camera- I bet you guys can't guess where we are going can you! **

**Me: -finally gets the question- Oh now I get it! -thinks about Zetsu and gets a nose bleed-**

**Gaara: O_o -shakes his head- **

**Sai: wow you got 2 guys**

**Me: SHUT UP! **

**Naruto: -looks into the camera- So anyone who guess correctly where we are going will get a centerfold picture of their favorite ****Naruto star as well as cookies**

**Haya: who would want a centerfold -looks into the camera- don't listen to him!**

**Sai: -shows a Haya a picture of Zetsu in the shower- See she wanted a picture -points to her-**

**Me: -gets a nosebleed and faints-**

**Naruto: By the way the hint has something to do with Wolves and highschool -still looking into the camera-**

**Sai: Well see you guys next time -sets the picture on Haya's face-**

**Naruto: -waves and shuts the camera off-**


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note:

**Haya: I'm baaack....sorry it took me so long to update but I was uber sick as well as uber lazy -yawns-**

**Gaara: -stares into the camera- Haya aka lapushxwolfxgirl does not own Naruto or Twilight**

**Haya: thats right -coughs- Today's special guest is.....Konohamaru! **

**-audience applauds- **

**Konohamaru: -runs into the room waving at the cameras- Hi guys!**

**Haya: Welcome to the show, word on the street is that you are going to prank Naruto and then post it on the Internet..is that true?**

**Konohamaru: Yes, it is as a matter of fact**

**Haya: Do you mind sharing it?**

**Konohamaru: And ruin the suspense no....**

**Gaara: Anyway on with the show.....**

* * *

Sai looked around then at Naruto, "so how long before this flight is over?" As soon as Naruto was about to speak up the captain got on the loudspeaker. "Hello this is your captain again, I just wanted to let

you guys know that Captain Jones of the Mist Village will not be stealling our snacks thanks to the Konoha Air Patrol. Those poor passengers on that other plane won't be going to California now, anyway I

just wanted to say that everyone can calm down and continue watching the movie. And to answer someone's question we will be arriving at our destination in 3 hours." Haya looked over the seat to see

what Sasuke was doing so she could finish carrying out her plan. Sasuke's snoring was so loud that some of the passengers that was seated next to the group either put their headphones on to drown out

the snoring or tried to open their window to jump out the plane. "Hey Sai, can I borrow your marker...the permanent one." Haya asked quietly looking Sai's way. "Um sure but what for exactly?" Sai asked

tossing it to Haya but instead the marker hit her square in the face. Haya gave Sai a death glare before getting out of her seat, she takes the top off the marker walks up to Sasuke's seat. Haya grinned

evily as she started drawing a flower on his cheek, a little mustache and the word "LOSER" on his forehead. Some of the passengers who was sitting near Sasuke was snickering and taking pictures with

their cellphones, Haya quickly admired her 'work of art' and quickly sat back down in her seat before the attendant came back. "Now I see what you wanted it for, I would have drew something else on his

face like a pe..." Sai was about to finish his sentence but Haya gave him a mean glare before he could utter his favorite word. "Why do you like to say that word, are you trying to make up for something

that you might be lacking?" Haya said trying not to laugh. "I'm not trying to compensate for anything, I actually have one thank you very much." Sai said firmly. "Really? You sure fooled me." Haya

retorted. "Why don't you come and see for yourself." "No thank you I think I will pass on that." Haya said rolling her eyes." A few minutes passed by, it was too quiet Gaara was sleeping peacefully he is so

cute when he is sleeping, Naruto was taking a nap as well I guess so he could bother us when we get there. Haya though to herself and narrated as well, she quickly pulled out her cellphone and snapped a

picture of Gaara setting it as her phone's wallpaper. Sai continued to draw looking at Haya every now and then. Haya decided to get up out of her seat and went to sit next to Sai to see what he was

drawing. "What are you drawing?" Haya asked trying not to sound bored. Sai handed the tablet to Haya. Haya opened the book and flipped through the pages but stopped at the last page, "oh my its

beautiful." she said as she looked at the drawing it looked like a wedding cake with a couple on top. "Thanks, I'm not done with it though." Sai said smiling a little as he grabbed the tablet and put it back in

his backpack. "Where did you get the design from?" Haya asked trying to make conversation. "I made it up myself..." Sai said feeling a little embarrassed. "Well it looks nice, who are the people on top of

the cake?" Haya asked a little interested. "Just some people." Sai blurted out. "What is it like?" Sai asked. "What's what like." Haya asked raising her eyebrow. "Baking, I always wanted to bake a cake."

Sai said boldly. "Uhh its fun, maybe one day we can bake one." Haya said trying not to sound or look surprised. 'That was weird..Sai wants to bake...weird oh well.' "Well I'm going to go back to my seat

now.." Haya said as she went back to her seat next to Gaara. Haya sat in the chair quietly texting Hinata abut thirty minutes later she dozed off. About two and a half hours later, the plane finally

landed...you wouldn't guess where. In Forks, Washington, why would Naruto want to go to Forks? The motley crew of five got off the plane and was stopped by security for some ninja items that was

accidently packed in the luggage. The security people made a big scene, the gang was taken into the back for interrogation. "Alright you kids, what are you doing with all these weapons and why do you

have a gourd full of sand?!" The security guard yelled at them as his eyes got as wide as saucers, he resembled Ibiki Morino a lot, we'll just call him "Baldy" for now. Naruto being the leader of this group,

decided to speak up only causing more trouble. "Well we're ninjas from Konoha and we forgot to leave our ninja weapons at home..." There was a long pause after Naruto spoke, then he spoke again. "The

sand belongs to him!!" Naruto said yelling pointing to Gaara. "Sir I did a internet check on this "Konoha" but it said on google that it is a made up village in Japan and that it doesn't exist." A young looking

security said frantically, if a person wasn't thinking they would take a double take and say is that Rock Lee. The interrogator moved his gaze from Naruto seeing that he isn't going to get anywhere with

this kid. "So you guys want to play games huh, where are your parents and do they know about this?" Baldy said. "Well if you mean strip poker then we love games and thats non of your business" Sai

said firmly. "STRIP POKER!?" Officer "Baldy" said in a surprised tone. "Strip poker, really where?" Naruto said frantically jumping up out of the chair. "Shut up di..." Sai was about to finish his sentence then

he gave Haya a puppy dog face, "alright fine you can say it." Haya said. "Shut up you dickless moron." Sai said throwing his shoe at Naruto hitting him where the sun don't shine, causing Naruto to fall to

the floor with a loud thud, with his hands between his legs. 'These kids are going to drive me crazy..' Officer "Baldy" thought to himself. Sasuke couldn't help form laughing from what was happening,

actually getting on everyone's nerves. "Shut up you gutless homo!" Haya shrieked at Sasuke causing him to sink in the chair he was sitting in. "That was niiiiice." Sai said in a Fonz like voice. Gaara

stretched out his neck to read the officer's badge. "Look Sanchez, we're just a bunch of kids who won a contest and someone pulled a prank on us by putting those weapons in our luggage, that's all. We're

not mentally capable of being dangerous let alone mature..See what I mean." Gaara said pointing to a now fighting Sai and Naruto, Sasuke was in the corner sobbing like a mad man from the statement

Haya made. Haya was in the chair next to Gaara laughing and texting Konohamaru frantically. Officer Sanchez slapped his forehead from all the madness that was happening. "Oi, he can control sand!!

Watch!" Naruto said as he chucked a balled up piece of paper at Gaara, his sand didn't defend him so instead he got hit in the face. Gaara just narrowed his eyes sending death glares to Naruto. "See what

he mean, so can we please go then?" Haya said not looking up from her cellphone. "Look you kids can go, get the heck out you kids are going to drive me crazy!" Officer Sanchez opened the door and

literally threw them out of the interrogation room, he then slammed the door behind them screaming curse words in Spanish on the other side. "Wow that was weird, good acting guys!" Haya said almost

in a cheerleader like tone. "Um what acting, we were serious..." Sai said in mono tone. After all that confusion, our heros went to the Starbucks inside the airport to plan what their going to do next. "Is it

me or do we look different..." Gaara said looking at Naruto and the rest of the gang. "What do you mean?" Haya asked in confusion. "Here look for yourself." Gaara said handing Haya a small mirror he

had in his pocket. "Oh my gosh!! I got pimples!!" Haya screamed nearly crying. "Um you had them all along except now their more transparent on your skin.." Sasuke said poking a zit on Haya's face. "So

you're saying that I'm dark now!" Haya said as she balled up her fist about to attack, Sasuke backing away slowly. "Well my theory is that, when we left from Konoha we must have entered into a parallel

universe causing us not to be anime characters but real people, thats why Gaara's sand didn't protect him from the rouge paper ball that Naruto threw." Sai said rubbing his chin looking into the camera.

Naruto disappeared for a few minutes then reappeared, smiling happily. "Guess what a limo is going to be picking us up and we're going to be staying in a hotel!" Naruto said jumping up and down, Haya

quickly calmed down then squealed happily. "Um that good and Naruto, but who is paying for all this?" Haya questioned. "MTV thats who, we're going to be on a show called, "Raccoons, Foxes and

Wolves." Naruto said holding up a contract with some poorly signed signatures of Sai, Sasuke, Gaara and Haya. "I do not sign my name like that!" Haya shrieked snatching the contracting from Naruto

trying to rip it up. "Did I mention that we each will get two thousand dollars a week to buy stuff..." Naruto said nervously twiddling his thumbs like what Hinata does. "Oh well then that settles that then,

I'm good no complaints." Haya said calming down smiling. "The Producer said that if we get good ratings, did I mention I'll have all the ramen I can eat, we'll have celebrity status, and we'll get paid

more...." Naruto said trailing off.

* * *

**Sasuke: So you mean to tell me we're going to be on a reality show?**

**Naruto: -walks into the room in a fox costume- Yep, on MTV -smiles-**

**Haya: That means we're going: to be famous, fangirls/fanboys woohoo!! **

**Sai: Nice, so when are we going to get some new threads? **

**Naruto: In the next chapter**

**Haya: One question, why are we in Forks? And what is the motive of this show, and how did MTV find us?**

**Naruto: You said one question! That's secret, and the show is like any other reality show on MTV, and I sent MTV a tape of our antics and the rest is history.**

**Gaara: We're out of time, see ya later guys -waves-**


	5. Authors Note!

Authors note

**Gaara:**without futher ado Haya's profile

**

* * *

**

**Name: **Haya Suzuki

**Age:** 18

**Look: **kinda looks like Sasuke but has a medium brown skin tone, cropped short raven black hair & hazelish brown eyes that change to grey at times.

**Family: **Mom, Half brothers: Itachi and Sasuke

**Personality: ** very shy when first meeting people, loves to act immature and prank on her closest friends. When angry fangs, wolf ears and a wolf tail appear.

**Power:** Can communicate and summon wolves as well as transform into one.


	6. Chapter 5

**Author's Note**

**Haya: Yay its good to be back -starts reading from a piece of paper- okies one person said that I need to learn formating and let me put it terms to help some people who says that I need to learn....ookies when I posted my chapters I was USING my mom's APPLE laptop so the formatting was a little different and plus on my end it looked okay and second don't like the formating then don't read. And another thing people who critcise anonamously like said person i metion earlier their comments are not biased here...seriously in my opinion people who do that remind me of cowards say mean stuff and don't even give a person a chance to explain theirselves, sheesh**

**Gaara: Wow I never seen you rant before, anyway lapushxwolfxgirl does not own Twilight or Naruto**

**Haya: Speaking of which, why are you wearing a fox costume Naruto? **

**Naruto: -gives a thumbs up to the camera- To get more fangirls than Sasuke**

**Haya: I'm a fangirl......I love foxes -smiles-**

**Gaara: -glares- **

**Haya: -sweat drops- I love foxes and raccoons hehe**

**Sai: Anyway on with the show**

* * *

"Okay let me get this straight, unless we get ratings, no money or no ramen?" Haya said looking down at the ground.

"That's pretty much it, so we need to constantly act wild and crazy!" Naruto said excitedly pumping his fist in the air.

"The limo is here!" Naruto said running out to the outside to greet the limo driver. The limo driver got out of the limo,

and came inside the airport to get the luggage. "Um Naruto, we didn't bring anything.....how did we get suitcases?"

Sasuke asked scratching his head. "Um from the television station..." Naruto said scratching his head. "Limo! come on!"

Haya completely losing her composure grabbed Gaara, ran outside to the limo, she opened the door and climbed inside with

Gaara behind her. "Wow this is nice, what's this?" Haya said noticing 5 manila colored envelopes on the seat next to her. "It

looks like an envelope, with each of our names on it. Gaara said studying the envelope. Haya shrugged and opened the envelope

addressed to her. Inside the envelope, it was a profile for her reality show character. "Cool, my name is going to be Nikki Deveraux,

my nickname is Mia, I'm Brazilian..and Sasuke is my twin brother." Haya read down the list. "I'm known as the rebellious punk who loves

Raven.." Haya shrugged. Gaara read his profile as his eyes got wide. "I-I'm Nolan Crews...wow Naruto must have come up with these

names.." Gaara said rolling his eyes as he read down the list. "I'm gothic with a passion for singing? My nickname is Raven and I'm

British." Gaara slapped his forehead as everyone climbed into the limo. "What's wrong Gaara?" Naruto asked in a innocent tone. "Gothic

I don't mind but a passion for singing! You got to be kidding me!" Gaara growled as Sasuke and Sai started laughing at him. "Let's see what

mines says, I'm Chase Deveraux, my nickname is The Torch and I'm the party boy/playboy. Alright! " Sasuke said as he read his list. "Mines

says, Taylor Crews, my nickname is Angel and I'm known as the Artist. And I'm British. Awesome." Sai said actually smiling a real genuine smile.

"Wha'cha think guys?" Naruto asked bouncing up and down in his seat. "It's alright I guess." Haya said. "I hate it.." Gaara said crossing his arms

and pouting. "Two words... Hella Sweet." Sasuke said smiling giving two thumbs up. "Awesome....but why Angel?" Sai said looking down at the paper.

After fifteen minutes of driving, the limo pulled up in front of a hotel. The limo driver opened the door for them to get out and our heroes walked inside

the hotel, to their surprise the hotel looked very expensive. Naruto walked up to the front, checked in then gave a key to Sai, Haya, Gaara and Sasuke.

"The room is on the 4th floor." Naruto said as they went into the elevator, Sai pushed the button for the 4th floor. They got off the elevator and

walked down the hall, "room number 412 here we are.." Naruto said as he stuck the key card into the door and opened the door revealing a hotel

style apartment with 3 bedrooms. "Hey this isn't a hotel!" Naruto said fuming. "No duh Sherlock, it's a apartment...these are hotel styled apartment."

Sai said rolling his eyes. "Wow I can't wait to party!" Sasuke said smiling. "Random much." Haya said rolling her eyes as well. "Did you guys really think

that you were going to be here by yourselves?" A familiar voice said from behind them. The gang turned around to see Yamato smiling. "Hey Chief."

Haya said smiling. "That's dad to you missy." Yamato said pointing a finger at Haya. "Dad?" Haya said tilting her head in curiosity. "Here read this..."

Yamato handed her his profile sheet. "Shiki Deveraux, adoptive father to you brats, Drill Sergeant and part time high school PE teacher...." Haya read

the paper out loud. "Cool an drill sergeant, how did you get a job like that?" Sasuke asked. "The producer knows someone....that's all I'm saying;

now go to your rooms!" Yamato said giving them his trademark scary face. Haya, Sasuke and Gaara scrambling in one room, Naruto and Sai

in another. "I could get use to this father stuff." Yamato said as he flopped on the couch and turned on television. Sasuke was pacing the floor;

Haya was going though the closet that was already packed with clothes, Gaara was looking at futon bed that was right next to the bunk beds.

"I call top bunk!" Haya said dropping the shirt she had in her hands and jumping onto top bunk. "Whoa slow down spider monkey." Gaara said as

he chuckled. "What's this?" Sasuke said noticing a schedule on the desk. "It appears to be a high school schedule...one for each of us." Haya said

noticing a schedule with her name on it. "Well lets see I have English, Geometry, PE, and Biology." Haya said reading down the list. "Same." Gaara

said raising his hand. "Biology, History, Geometry and PE. I love math!" Sasuke said smiling. " Shut up, I hate it..its evil." Haya said clenching her fists.

"Way to live up to your character, Mia." Gaara said grinning a little. "Shut up." Haya said pouting as she glared daggers at him. "Looks like someone isn't

going to go first base tonight." Sasuke grinned evilly. "What's first base?" Gaara asked in a confused tone, he pulled out his blackberry then Googled it

and found out. "Oh we already did that...on the plane remember?" Gaara said smiling evilly. "You have no shame do you?" Haya said glaring at Sasuke.

"What if I don't, what are you going to do about it?" Sasuke said putting his hands on his hips. "This." Haya then jumped off her bunk, tackling Sasuke to

the floor and they started wrestling. Gaara just stared until Sasuke clawed Haya's shirt off, Gaara had a massive nosebleed when he saw Haya in her black

push up bra. Having a quick thought Gaara pulled out his blackberry, took a picture of Haya and accidently sent it to a few people as he was setting it as his phone's

wallpaper and then ran into the bathroom to tend to his bloody nose. Ten minutes later he came out with toilet paper stuck up his nose to control the

bleeding. To his surprise Haya changed her clothes to a black shirt with a red heart on it and a pair of black cargo pants; they were laughing and talking

as if nothing happened ten minutes earlier. Sasuke had a few scratches on his face as well did Haya, "Siblings...ya gotta love em'." Gaara mumbled as

he climbed on his futon. In Naruto and Sai's room, Sai was well drawing in his tablet and Naruto was going through the clothes in the closet, trying to

live up with profile which is a skater. Yamato sighed as he got up from the couch, then he first went to Naruto and Sai's room. "You guys got school Monday,

so you better set your clothes out." Yamato said in a demanding voice as he walked into their bedroom. "But its Friday night, we got two more days till Monday."

Naruto whined. Yamato walked really close to Naruto almost face to face, he then gave his trademark scary face causing Naruto to hit the ceiling screaming.

"You really have a knack for this father thing.." Sai said not looking up from his tablet. "Thanks." Yamato turned around about to leave out the room until.

"Do you think it will be okay that Haya and Gaara are going to be sharing a room together?" Sai said putting down his sketchbook. Yamato arched an eyebrow,

finding it suspicious that Sai would mention something like that. "I'm sure it will be okay and besides Sasuke is in there with her so it will be fine." Yamato said

as he went in to his room to change from his ninja clothes into some clothes that would scream 'parent'. A few minutes later he walked out of the room wearing a;

regular black t-shirt, a pair of dark blue jeans and some sneakers. He sighed as he looked in the mirror to remove his headband; he then stared at his reflection.

'I'm going to miss you.' He thought looking at his headband as he laid it in the drawer. Yamato then took a deep breath and left out of his room to check on the

'other brats'. He barged in to their room, meaning to lecture them about their loud behavior from earlier. But however as soon as he walked in, Sasuke was in the

shower singing, "Sexy Back by Justin Timberlake." Haya and Gaara were snickering at the tape recorder they had set in the bathroom. "What's going

on in here?" Yamato said covering his ears from Sasuke's howling. "Well Sasuke is singing in the shower…" Gaara said trying to hold back his laughter.

"Why aren't the cameras following us?" Haya asked looking around suspiciously. "Because their setting up across the hall and they'll be filming tomorrow.

Oh and by the way keep it down." Yamato said in a stern voice trying to sound fatherly. "You see these shackles baby I'm your slave I'll let you whip me

if I miss behave…..It's just that no one makes me feel this way." Sasuke started singing even louder thrusting his hips as he danced in the shower.

"Oh Gawd, somebody please shut him up!" Sai yelled from the other room throwing his tablet against the wall pulling his hair out in the process.

Yamato sighed as he walked over to the bathroom door, pounding his fist against the door. "Sasuke shut the hell up or I'll make you suffer a fate worse than

being whipped!" Sasuke apparently didn't hear the complaints and he continued his singing completely unaware of the tape recorder or that a angry parent

was waiting for him on the other side the door. Haya getting a great idea, she got up from her spot next to Gaara, opened the bathroom door took out her

cell phone and started filming Sasuke and his singing. 'This will get a lot of views on Youtube.' Haya thought to herself as she continued filming Sasuke,

hoping he wouldn't notice her presence. Ring. Ring. Ring. "Oi I got a message. It's from Kiba.." Gaara said as he stared at his phone as he opened the message.

It read, "YOU ARE SO LUCKY, HER CHEST IS HUGE!" Gaara realizing that he had accidently sent the picture to a few people he shook his head laughing at

Kiba's abuse of the caps lock completely forgetting about the accident. Then he got another message but from Sai, apparently someone forwarded the message to

him, "damn, she is fine." Gaara's right eye started twitching as he texted Sai back, "wat the hell?" A text came back from Sai, "wat she is, u r more clue

less than Sasuke is…." Ring. Ring. Ring. Gaara's phone started ringing, he looked at his phone and a picture of Neji flashed on the screen. Instead of

texting Neji did it the lazy way and decided to call. "Hello." Gaara said as he answered the phone. Heavy breathing could be heard over the phone

then someone spoke. "Gaaaaara how did you get that close? Why is she looking mad? Can you send me another one…I need it like nooooooow." (A/N: I know what

you people are thinking and that is just gross and wrong....Neji is on a roller coaster in Konoha's new Amusement park.)

"Um Neji, what are you doing why you sound like you're out of breath?" Gaara asked a little concerned. "Ugh n-nothing, please get me another picture.

Ugh." (A/N: -rolles eyes- roller coaster people) Neji asked sounding pitiful, wow the Hyuga prodigy sounding desperate over a picture.

Haya stopped her cellphone from recording and quickly logged into her Youtube account and uploaded her video. Within ten minutes she got over

a million views and a couple hundred thousand comments. "Wow we're celebrities…well Sasuke is anyway." Haya said smiling completely

unaware of what was going on around her. Yamato was in down the hall talking to the producer. "I feel like I wanna bake something."

Haya said staring off into the distance as she walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen. Gaara was lost in thought sitting on his

futon as he tried to figure why Neji was acting so strange. Sasuke was logging on to his Myspace account when he had like a million

messages from Sakura, he opened up one of them and it read; "what the heck are you doing on Youtube naked in the shower singing!"

'I'm on Youtube? How could that be?' He thought to himself as he went to Youtube to check it out. Three minutes of seeing

himself thrusting his hips and singing, his eye started twitching and he fell backwards in the chair. Haya was humming happily as she opened up the

cabinets that were surprisingly stocked with food, she pulled out a box of yellow cake mix and a jar of chocolate frosting. She smiled as she walked to

Sai and Naruto's room and grabbed Sai by the arm pulling him into the kitchen. "You wanted to bake a cake right? Well you can help me." She said smiling

as she got a cake pan out of the cabinet.

* * *

**Haya: -walks into the room dressed as a wolf- I'm bored now**

**Gaara: So Yamato is going to be a drill Sergeant and our 'father', Naruto how long is show supposed to air?**

**Naruto: Well if we get good ratings then for a while**

**Gaara: -stares at Haya- why are you dressed up like a wolf?**

**Haya: because Naruto is doing it, you should try it sometimes its fuuuuun**

**Sasuke: -walks in to the room dressed as a black cat- Sai, you want to bake a cake....that's kinda girly don't you think? -girns-**

**Haya: There is nothing girly about Sai wanting to bake a cake, a lot of girls will respect a guy if he can cook**

**Sai: Thank you, Haya**

**Naruto: riiiight, well see you guys next chapter**

**Gaara: I'm curious what is happening in Konoha**

**Naruto: -shuts the camera off-**


	7. Chapter 6

**AN:**

**Lapushxwolfxgirl: Hi peoples, I'm back...sorry about taking a long time to write but i'm super lazy...probably lazier than Shikamaru -grins-**

** Shikamaru: Hey no one is more lazier than me, besides your just as lazy -stares off into space-**

**Naruto: well I know everyone is curious about how Zetsu is coping with Haya's strange family...well...**

**Lapushxwolfxgirl: My family is not strange...crazy yes but not strange**

**Sai: Anyway everybody shut up, its starting! **

**Gaara: Oi I almost forgot, Lapushxwolfxgirl aka Haya don't own Naruto or Twilight only herself **

* * *

**~Back in Konoha~**

"Hey Haya come here and look at this?" Haya's mom, Yoko said to Zetsu. "Yes ma'am I'm coming!" Zetsu yelled from down the stairs

trying his best to sound like Haya. 'Naruto is so going to pay, for starters I don't look like Haya and second of all where have they gone too?'

Zetsu thought as he trudged down the stairs to the family room to see what Haya's mother wanted. "Hey sit down for a second, there's this

commercial I want you to see." She said as her and Haya's step-dad stared at the t.v. Zetsu crossed his arms as sat down on the couch.

"From the makers of The Real World and Jackass, comes a new reality show with 5 unruly teenagers." The announcer said and a clip with

Haya and Gaara kissing flashed on the screen, "See the sibling rivalry, true love, wild partying and reckless use of money. Raccoons, Foxes and Wolves,

premiering tonight at 8/7 central." Zetsu's eyes widened as he stared at the t.v. screen, shaking his head in disbelief. Yoko was staring in shock at the t.v.

screen her mouth wide open. "My baby kissed a boy, and they're not married!" She screamed as she glared at Zetsu. "You shouldn't be kissing on guys;

I thought I taught you better than that!" She said as she continued to scream at Zetsu. "But…I didn't…" Zetsu answered innocently. "Umm Yoko, she's right

she didn't kiss a guy because; Haya was here the whole time and there would be cameras following her around if that was her on t.v." Haya's step-dad said

trying to calm Haya's mom down. "Well I guess you're right then Roy, I shouldn't worry. I'm sorry Haya for yelling at you and accusing you." Yoko said blushing

in embarrassment. "It's okay mom, I'm going back to my room now." Zetsu said as he got up and ran up the stairs back to Haya's room. He flopped on Haya's

bed and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and quickly dialed Naruto's number. Ramen. Ramen. Ramen. "What a weird call tone." Zetsu mumbled under his

breath as he waited for Naruto to answer." "Hey Aloe Vera, what's up?" "Well let's see, um there's a reality show with you guys on its tonight and how in the world

am I going to explain that. Oh what am I going to say, that girl is a look-a-like and that boy isn't Sasuke. Naruto help me out here! By the way where are you guys?"

"In Forks Washington." "You mean that place in that book….I thought that place wasn't real." "Oh it's very real, believe it." "So how are we going to

combat this problem?" Zetsu asked rubbing his temples. "Give me a few minutes, I got a plan." Naruto said as he hung the phone up and made a few

phone calls. A few minutes later Itachi of all people was knocking on the former Uchiha which is now the Suzuki mansion door. Haya's mom opened the

door and Itachi walked in. "Where have you been Sasuke?" Yoko asked putting her hands on her hips. "I've been hanging out at the amusement park with Kiba and

Neji." Itachi said scratching his head. "Oh well okay, Haya is upstairs and you guys need to clean your room." She said as she walked back to the family room.

'My God, Naruto was right. I can't believe I pulled it off.' Itachi thought as he walked up the stairs. 'Man this place brings back so many memories.'

Itach walked into 'Haya's room' saw Zetsu, sitting down pulling his hair out. "Yo long time no see." Itachi said. Zetsu looked up to see Itachi as his eyes

bugged out. "What are you doing here, don't tell me you came to massacre what remaining 'Uchiha' that is here…." Itachi grinned as he sat beside Zetsu, "um no,

besides I had a reason why I did that." "Why are you dressed up like Sasuke, and did you cut your hair?" Zetsu asked running his hands through his hair.

"Naruto personally asked me to do this and I'm wearing a wig. I'm not about to cut my perfect hair for no one." "Yea I guess so; you have always taken good

care of your hair." Zetsu said laughing. Itachi's just stared at Zetsu giving him a shut up look. "Ugh I'm surprised Sasuke doesn't have a girlfriend seriously

you would have thought, he would try to 'restore' the Uchiha clan." Itachi said lying back on Haya's bed. "Do you have a girlfriend?" Zetsu asked facing Itachi.

"No it's so hard to find a decent girl these days especially one that is not an obsessive fan-girl. They are all like Itachi-san, I'll bear your child or stuff like that it's

so creepy and disturbing." Itachi shuddered as he stared at the ceiling. "Wow even the great Itachi Uchiha gets creeped out by fan-girls." Zetsu said bursting

out laughing pointing at Itachi. "Keep it up plant." Itachi narrowed his eyes at Zetsu. "Right um how did Naruto get you to um come here dressed up as Sasuke?"

Zetsu asked trying to change the conversation as a sweat drop appeared on the back of his head. "Well he told me how Haya was keeping Sasuke in line and how

she looks like me more and more each day." Itachi said puffing out his chest proudly. "Well she look like you because of the lack of sleep...I'm surprised that she

won't start looking like Gaara soon." Zetsu said flatly. "Mostly all Uchiha look like me and that proves that she truly is one….well at least half Uchiha anyway. I'm

bored; wanna go to the amusement park that just opened up?" Itachi asked before yawning from complete boredom. "There's an amusement park in town?"

Zetsu asked in a confused tone. "The town looks like something from off of Happy Days and a Grease movie and you're surprised over an amusement park?"

Itachi shook his head as he hopped off the bed. "Let's go Zetsu." "I'm right behind you." Both Zetsu and Itachi walked down the stairs and to the front door,

"Mom, Sasuke and I are going to meet Ino and Shikamaru at the park." Zetsu said waiting for an answer. "Ok, just don't stay out to long and no boys." Yoko

called from the family room. "Heh no boys, we are boys." Itachi said chuckling to himself. "So where is Kisame anyway?" Zetsu asked as they passed by a

once Ichiraku Ramen now a Ichiraku Diner. "He said something about going to Sea World to visit some old friends. Itachi said shrugging his shoulders.

"Sea World, right?" Zetsu said in a shocked tone as he tried to picture Kisame at Sea World. "How does Kisame have friends at Sea World, what did he use

to do there?" Zetsu said trying his best not to burst out laughing. "Well he used to be a performer like the other fish, but he was popular because he was

half human, one day he found out that there was more to the world than being a performer so he left and became a ninja. " Itachi said rubbing his temples;

he then looked up at Zetsu realizing something was off about him. "Don't you have two personalities?" Itachi asked looking at Zetsu strangely. "Yea I do but

and to be honest since Naruto asked me to be Haya, um well I don't know how to put this but I actually have three personalities but since I'm supposed to

act like Haya my third personality came out and the other two are inside my mind." Zetsu said shaking his head. "This is the story of a girl who cried a

river and drowned the whole world. And while she looks so sad in photographs I absolutely love her when she smiles." Zetsu smiled brightly when he took his

Blackberry Curve (An: so what I'm a techno geek...) out of his pocket, it was a text message from Haya. It read, "Hey Zetsu, how r u? Wha'cha up too?" "You still like

her huh?" Itachi asked smiling a little. "Yea I do." Zetsu sighed as he started thinking about his past and how he first met Haya.

* * *

**Me: I'm hungry... -stomach growls-**

**Gaara: So how close are you and Zetsu anyway? -raises a eyebrow-**

**Me: He is the cheese to my macaroni -laughs a little-**

**Gaara: -sulks in a corner- **

**Naruto: Meow...hmmm there is going to be a lot of cute little Gaara and Zetsu babies running around **

**Me: Huh, what do you mean? -tilts head curiously- **

**Sai: You forgot little Sai babies as well -smiles-**

**Me: Ewwwwww thats gross, guys can't have children...**

**Sai and Naruto: -does a anime fall- **

**Sasuke: -shakes his head and looks into the camera- See I have to deal with this crazyness everyday its we todded **

**Neji: Hello all -looks into the camera and shuts it off-**


	8. Chapter 7 special

**AN:**

**Lapushxwolfxgirl: Zetsu wanted to narrate as well as write chapter, but this is how Zetsu met Haya...and no she is not a Mary Sue...she is a victim of circumstance I mean come on she is a nice person -likes refering to herself in the 3rd person-**

**Zetsu: And it's narrated in my point of view, be warned the beginning is very disturbing...I am telling the truth if I wasn't I wouldn't be able to tell it right. Those who came here for a happy story with bunnies, faries, gumdrops and sprinkles leave now, this is about how love can be. By the way Haya does not own Twlight or Naruto**

* * *

**~ Thirteen years ago~**

I was only ten years old when he found me, the leader of Akatsuki, Pein. The day after I was born I was put in an orphanage, for some reason no

wanted to adopt me just because of how I look. When the perspective parents came to look at us me included, they would point at me and

yell, "what an ugly child." And the kids there as well made fun of me as well and would always pick on me and never let me play with them.

The orphanage was in the Kusagakure, I remember it correctly there was twenty-two kids and two adults, occasionally this young married

couple would come in to volunteer and help with the kids. The old caretakers which were an old married couple sometimes had volunteers to help

with us, whenever the volunteers saw me they would either avoid making eye contact or just avoided me period. The young couple I mentioned earlier,

their names were Kyoshi and Kimoko. Whenever Kyoshi and Kimoko would volunteer, I would feel happy and despite the way I look they would still treat me

like I was a normal kid. Often times I would hear them talk about adopting me and one day when I walked pass the grandma and grandpa's (what I call the

caretakers') office and I peeped in and saw the couple filling out the adoption papers to adopt me. I was so happy that I ran to my room tell my best and only friend

which happened to be my plant, Rosy. I was probably the happiest seven year old in the world; I was going to have new parents, my own bedroom and new clothes.

Kimiko came up the stairs to let me know the good news as well as help me pack my things, Kyoshi was still filling out the paperwork. The next three years

were the happiest years of my life, I graduated from the ninja academy at ten years old (only attended 2 and half years), went on missions sometimes with my

parents and I made one friend her name was Kitty. One day my parents as well as the other jounin in the village went on a mission, I heard no word from my

parents in two weeks. And one day there was a knock on the door and two anbu ninjas were at my door telling me that my parents were killed in action, at first

I didn't believe it and I thought they were still alive somewhere but that wasn't the case they were never coming back. Because of what happened I had to move

in with Kitty and her parents, they were very nice but it's nothing like having your own parents. About a month later I was on a mission, one that would change

my life forever. A week after I moved in with Kitty and her parents, I was given a mission to do some reconnaissance on the Kirigakure (Village Hidden in the Mist).

As I was walking through the forest towards the village, I felt numb I couldn't really explain it but like I just didn't have a reason to keep on existing. I decided to

take a break being that it was going to be a two day trip by foot before I reached the Kirigakure, I took my kunai out of my pouch and sat down, staring at my

kunai for ten minutes I made up my mind. I wanted to be with my parents, I just wanted the pain to go away. Here I am ten years old, no parents and

wavering between killing myself or grieving the loss of my parents. I cried as I pressed the kunai closer to my neck feeling the cold metal against my skin.

I would sever the artery, it would be painful but that would be nothing compared to what my heart was suffering from. I pressed the kunai closer to my skin

and I waited for the pain to come but there was no pain at all, so I opened my eyes to see him with my kunai in his hand. He had spiky orange hair, multiple

piercings and his eyes were purple with spirals in them, definitely not from this village. "You're too young to be doing something like that…." The stranger said to me.

"What do you care? I have nothing else to live for." I said as my voice began to crack and tears ran down my cheek. "I happen to know that what you're

about to do is a great sin and if you're trying to see your parents you won't see them…" He said. My eyes widened as I heard him say this, it's as if he's

reading my mind or something. "How…did...y-you..." "I understand what you are going through, the same thing happened to me when I was younger."

He said. I was about to open my mouth to ask him his name, but he answered my question. "I'm Pein, what is your name?" "I'm Zetsu…" I said kinda freaked

out about this guy, again it's like he's a mind reader. He stood up and looked me in the eyes, "I have an organization that I'm starting and I would like for you to join,

Zetsu." Pein said. I felt my happiness slowly returning, I had a purpose.

**~Six years later~**

I was on my way back to the Akatsuki lair, I had just finished a mission…to dispose of some evidence (well eat the evidence per say). When I arrived back to the lair, I

saw an angel so to speak. 'Who is that beautiful creature?' I thought to myself as I saw her walk off with Itachi. 'I could never have her, she's Itachi's girl.' I never

knew that she was Itachi's sister. Whenever I saw her my heart would feel like it was fluttering, I felt like I was floating on a cloud. One day, I was taking a

stroll in the garden (that's right there is a garden) and I saw her and Itachi training…well Itachi was torturing her if you asked me in my opinion.

Anyway I watched from behind a tree, she was so alluring..her beauty was very exotic. Every day whenever I had time I would go out to

the garden and watch her train, I just wanted to go up to her and introduce myself but I was afraid that Itachi would kill me or she would

be appalled my appearance. Hidan happened to notice my behavior and he happened to follow me out to the garden, he tapped me on my

shoulder snickering. "I see you got a crush on the new girl, huh?" He said grinning at me. "N-no I don't." I stuttered out blushing brightly.

"You're a terrible liar, you like her. You've been coming out here every day watching her, it's very amusing." He purred. I sighed giving in,

he caught me…I'm a terrible liar, I bet my face turned all shades of red if it could. "Who is she?" I asked. "Itachi's lil sister, he found her one day

and now he's training her to be a shinobi." He said. "Itachi have a sister, I thought him and Sasuke were the last of the Uchiha…" I said confused.

"She is his half sister, he is over protective of her and she is super quiet….personally in my opinion she is way too shy to be his sister." "How old is she?" I

asked staring closely at her. "She's fourteen I think, aha I was right you do like her!" He screamed pointing his finger in my face. I felt my heart beat

faster as I heard this, I'm only two years older than her and she is not Itachi's girl but merely his sister. "Kakuzu, I was right you owe me fifty bucks!"

Hidan said running back inside. "Aww crap!" Kakuzu said as he reached into his wallet and handed Hidan fifty dollars. Itachi's eyebrow began to twitch

as he turned to where the noise was coming from, feeling as if I was found out I stepped from behind the tree to face him and his sister.

She was even more breathtaking up close, I knew in my heart she was the one for me. She smiled slightly as me as Itachi just glared, she

looked at him then walked over to me smiling sweetly. "H-hello I'm H-haya." She spoke still smiling. "I'm Zetsu…" Itachi just shook his head and sat

down on a bench as he watched us closely. "I-it's n-nice to meet you Zetsu." She stuttered out, Hidan was right she is shy but I don't care about that

at all. Her beautiful copper tan skin glistened in the sun as she blushed. "Can I touch those?" She asked in an innocent yet childish voice as she pointed

to my Venus fly trap appendages. I nodded my head feeling a bit surprised that she was not freaked out at all. She reached out her hand and gently

touched them, I shuttered a little...it felt a little strange to feel someone else touch me. Instantly my fly trap attachments receded into my skin, that was

the first time that had ever happened to me….she blinked tilting her head to the side as she stared at me in confusion. "T-that has never happened to me

before…" I stuttered out. All of a sudden my other personality as like to call him 'Blackie' (the darker side of my body) took over, and to both of us by

surprise I kissed her. Itachi's eyes widen as he saw this, he really looked as if he pissed his pants. She looked down nervously twiddling ther fingers blushing

a bright red. "That was m-my first kiss." She said. "I'm sorry, but my other personality took over and that was my first kiss as well." I felt flushed as I turned

my face in embarrassment.

* * *

**Zetsu: There's more to this story but, I kinda feel a bit tired... -groans-**

**Me: this is going to be a loooong chapter -goes to make popcorn-**

**Gaara: -completely speechless-**


	9. Chapter 8

**Authors note:**

**Oi guys I'm back -sighs- college work is soo troublesome and boring**

**Shikamaru: -yawns- you are so right, its such a drag...being forced to take completely different classes that doesn't even apply to your major its troublesome**

**Me: yea. btw I changed my penname from lapushxwolfxgirl to Haya Uchiha because it looked fun sooo...yea**

**Hidan: -appears- Howdy ya'll Hi-hi does not own Naruto or Twilight but herself**

**Kakuzu: Hurry up you fool, time is money and I got a yaoi to film! -stomps off grumbling-**

**Hidan: stupid _bleep bleep bleep bleep bleep_ parten and hisstupid _bleep bleep bleep yaoi -stomps off behind Kakuzu-_**

**Sai: Well I made a yaoi...**

**Shikamaru: well oook then on with the show**

**Me: btw be warened for Hidan's mouth**

* * *

Before a blink of the eye Itachi was in front of us, giving me a death glare he grabbed Haya's arm and then disappeared into a cloud of smoke.

With that I knew I would never be able to see her around Itachi or else the consequences might be dire. I sighed putting my head down in defeat as

I walked back into the mansion, Hidan was sitting at the table with Deidara when he saw me walking. "What's wrong lover boy?" he said grinning

evilly, I sighed as I took a seat next to them. "Itachi don't want me near Haya and I really like her..." I said hiding my face in my hands. "Oi, Zetsu

what happened to your Venus fly trap thingies, un?" Deidara asked. "I don't know, it just disappeared, I really wanna see her again." Deidara looked

at Hidan then nodded his head smiling, "you need to know what she likes, dislikes, her favorite colors, favorite foods and such." Deidara said handing

me a notebook and a pencil. "Take note of what I'm about to tell you." I opened the notebook and nodded my head as Deidara opened his mouth.

"She likes chocolate, cake, pineapples, vampires, cranberry juice, sushi, ninjas, cooking, drawing, anything punk rock, emo and goth, wolves and staying up

late. She dislikes: shopping, sleeping, mean people, guys that try to move to fast in a relationship, and tight clothes. Her favorite colors are: black, red, and

sky blue. You got all that, un?" Deidara asked as Hidan stared at him wide eyed, I was frantically scribbling in the notebook trying to remember what he

told me. "How the fuck do you know all this stuff about her?" Hidan asked. "Because I'm the one who takes her shopping and she told me all of this.

Deidara said crossing his arms. "Thanks." Zetsu said as he walked to his room, he opened the door and flopped on his bed. "What do I do, I wanna see her again."

The lighter side said in a low voice. "Well for starters, we need to change our attitude and our wardrobe." The black side grumbled. Zetsu sighed and closed his

eyes, then after a few minutes he jolted up with a idea. He took out his Sidekick phone and googled how to be punk, a couple of links popped up and he clicked on

the first one titled, "How to be punk." He smiled and started reading down, while scribbling what kind of stuff he needed. He got up and went to his closet to look

for some of the clothes that the how to guide said he would need. "Great, I don't have any of this stuff." Both of his sides said in union. He sighed and left out of his

bedroom, 'I'll go to the mall to find this stuff.' He thought to himself as he walked pass Hidan and Deidara who was in the rec room watching tv. "Where ya off to in such

a hurry?" Hidan said not looking away from the tv. "I'm going out, I'll be back later." Zetsu said as he put on his ninja sandles and left out of the cave. "Hey wait for

me, un!" Deidara said as he ran behind him. "Why are you going with me?" Zetsu asked in utter shock. "Because you are going to need my help.." Deidara said.

"Okay fine then." Zetsu said as he started walking, Deidara right behind him. "Shouldn't we disguise ourselves, un?" Deidara said. "Oh right I forgot about that."

Zetsu said smacking his forehead, he then did a few hand symbols and a cloud of smoke appeared. "How do I look?" He asked Deidara as the smoke cleared.

"Um like Eminem, only with piercings.." Deidara said in shock. "Who is Eminem? And do I really?" Zetsu asked raising one eyebrow. "You don't know who Eminem is...?"

Deidara asked almost raising his voice, he then gets his phone out of his pocket and googles a picture of Eminem. "This is what Eminem looks like." He shows Zetsu his

phone, "this is Eminem, he's a rapper..." Deidara sighs and shakes his head, 'I'm going to have to teach him alot.' He thought to himself, Deidara did a few hand symbols as

did Zetsu a cloud of smoke appeared. His hair was much shorter and his appearence looked that of Jade Puget from AFI. After a few hours of walking they finally reached

the Suna Mall. "Where do we start first?" Zetsu asked puzzled completely obvlious to the gaggle of fangirls drooling over him. "Oh my gosh its Eminem get him!" One girl

said trying attack him, he turns around starts running frantically trying to escape the horror. To think a S-Class criminal cannabalistic plant man running for his life from

hormonal teenage girls, what a priceless and or funny sight. Deidara shook his head and decieding to meet Zetsu later he went to Hot Topic and got started on his

shopping. "Can I help you sir...oh my gosh you're Jade Pudget from AFI!" A cashier behind the counter said blushing madly. Deidara grinned evily, this was going to work

in his favor. A few hours later he was sitting in the food court looking for Zetsu. "Yo." Zetsu said limping over to him, his clothes in tatters, his shirt missing and his pants

ripped a few bruises and scratches. "Wow what happened to you, un?" "F-fangirls are...evil." "Well i did your shopping for you and me and I gave out a few autographs

as well, oh I think you might need this." Deidara said going the bag tossing Zetsu a black shirt with a skull on it, Zetsu didn't look at the shirt and just nodded and quickly

put the shirt on.

* * *

**~Back to the Present~**

Zetsu grinned a little as he replied to Haya's text message, "I'm good, how r u? I'm walking with Itachi." He clicked send and put his phone back in

his pocket. "So are we really going to meet Ino and Shikamaru in the park?" Zetsu asked as he noticed that they walked pass the park. Itachi chuckled

a little as they kept walking. "No, we're going to meet Hidan and Kakuzu." Itachi said cooly as they kept walking. "Hold on a second, isn't Hidan

incapacitated and isn't Kakuzu dead?" Zetsu asked raising his eyebrow. Itachi coughs and smiles evily, "they were but we had a little help from Madara

and Pein." He said coolly moving his bangs from his face as they continued into the forest. "What the fuck took you guys so long!" Hidan said coming out

the shadows with Kakuzu behind him counting his money. "Damn, Hi-hi you've grown tall," he whistles as he looks at Zetsu's butt, "Zetsu must be dickless to

not have already had this." Hidan whistled as he grabbed Zetsu's butt. Kakuzu looked up at the situation then back down at his money, "you fool that's not Haya,

that's Zetsu." Zetsu was grinding his teeth and clenching his fist trying his best to kill Hidan. Hidan's eyes literally bugged out and he slowly backed away, "I'm

sorry Plant, I didn't mean that...but your ass do look nice though." Zetsu's venus fly trap attachments appeared as his eye started twitching, Itachi grabbed

Zetsu's collar, "look Zetsu you can get Hidan back later but right we have a mission." "Oh right, what is the mission by the way?" Tobi appeared of the shadows

with Pein and Konan as they walked towards them, then Deidara fell out of tree near them as Sasori came from under a rock. "We have another mission,

I've got word from reading this book," Pein held up a Twilight paperback book, "that there are peoplke who have immortality and have super human abilities,

if we can get their powers then we will be unstoppable!" Pein said pumping his fist in the air laughing evily. "That and we all need a vacation." Konan said

wrapping her arm around Pein's. "So when do we go, un?" Deidara asked as he walked towards them dressed like Jade Puget. "We leave now and by the way

everyone need a disguise." Pein said in a serious tone. Everyone nodded their head in agreement then did a few hand signs and everyone except Itachi, Zetsu

and Deidara. "To Forks Washington! Tobi is a good boy!" Tobi said raising his hand up in the air. "Oi guys wait up for me!" Kisame said jogging up to them grinning

ear to ear. Pein eyebrow twitched as he glared at Kisame, "use your jutsu to change so we can hurry up and go." Kisame nodded his head, a cloud of smoke appeared

and he transformed. "No again onward to Forks Washington!" Tobi said again in a jolly voice. "Hey wait for us!" A female voice said from the shadows, Haku and Zabuza

then appeared. "What the fuck is this?" Hidan said glaring at them, Kisame and everyone completely ignoring Hidan looked at Zabuza. "What's up man, thought you were

dead?" Kisame said doing his secret handshake with Zabuza. "Just chillin yo, been brought back from the dead now I wanna clean slate and start again ya know."

Zabuza said flashing his new grillz on his teeth. "Whoa you straight up gangster, dawg." Kisame said showing off his bling on his neck. "Okay this is very weird and

random and can we go?" Sasori said massaging his temples. "Oi how am I going to fool Haya's parents that me and Itachi didn't leave?" Zetsu said groaning.

"I already have that taken care of. I got two people to take your places." Pein said as he started walking.

* * *

**~Back in the town~ **Two teenage zombies were sitting on a bench awaiting their orders from Pein. Beep Beep Beep Beep. "Finally its him." the male said

looking at his phone, "he said to be back at the mansion in about 2 hours." "I'm only doing this because I get to get Sasuke-kun underwear and other personal

belongings." Said the girl who was non other than Karin and the boy was Suigetsu. "Why do I have to get stuck with you?" Suigetsu groaned as he smacked his

forehead. "Stop complaining, you get to see how Sasuke lives." Karin said in a happy yet girly voice. "I don't give a darn about that idiot, I'm just doing this

because I'm trying to find out about the Suzuki kekkei genkai.

* * *

**Me: Well that was a weird turn of events, Sai how did you make a yaoi?**

**Sai: Well um some female director said she'll pay me to be in a yaoi and um yea so I agreed**

**Me: -gets a nosebleed- wow i wanna see it**

**Sakura: -appears out of nowhere- me too!**

**Naruto: -appears out of nowhere still wearing his fox costume- me three!**

**Me and Sakura: -punches Naruto- NO!**

**Shikamaru: -shakes his head- Wow this is gonna get good**

**Hidan: woohoo cat fight! Go Hi-hi!**

**Me: Stop calling me Hi-hi! **

**Konohamaru: untill next time...bye! **

**Neji: -shuts the camera off-**


	10. Chapter 9

**Authresses Note:**

**Me: I'm baaack! it's almost Christmas -throws confetti then does a happy dance- Well I've been really busy with school work and being lazy and all so I was thinking about making a Christmas omake chapter...heck I might make it a whole story because its**

**Zetsu: -walks into the room dressed like Eminem then stares into the camera- it will most likely be super random, so anyway on to the disclaimer LaZyxJuNcHuRiKi does not own Naruto, Iphone or any of the other items abused in this fic she only owns herself...-pauses then thinks for a second- WHY CAN'T YOU LIKE ME LIKE THE WAY YOU LIKE GAARA!**

**Me: -smiles sweetly- i do like you, you're my best friend -completely clueless-**

**Sasuke: how can you be so freaking clueless your a medic ninja in training come on! he likes you as in he wants to date you duh -shakes his head-**

**Me: nuh uh he didn't say so, so mind your own business...wait is that true Zetsu?**

**Zetsu: ...**

**Naruto: ran out of time, on with the show!**

**

* * *

**

**~Back in Forks, Washington~**

"Okay Sai, what does the box of cake mix say we need?" Haya asked like the way a teacher who already knows the answer would ask a student. Sai studying the box, Haya was

staring at him intently waiting for him to answer. "It says we need 2 eggs, a stick of butter and a tablespoon of oil. What does a tablespoon mean?" Sai asked with confused tone

scratching his head. Haya then clicked her tongue and thought for a second then spoke. "It a measurement and we need a measuring spoon." She then got up and walked over to

the drawer and fished out a measuring spoon and a whisk. "This is a measuring spoon and this is called a whisk its used for mixing the ingredients, I'll be right back." Haya smiled

then left out of the kitchen to go to her bedroom to take her contacts out and put her glasses, she grabbed her purse and ran into the bathroom shutting the door behind her. Gaara

and Sasuke were watching Date Movie on the 32 inch flat-screen in the room when Haya came out of the bathroom with her glasses on, Sasuke noticing something from the side of his

vision he did a 180 turn and looked at Haya in complete shock. "KARIN, WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING HERE, I TOLD YOU NO MEANS NO!" Sasuke screamed in complete horror, Haya

arched her eyebrow as she walked closer to him and smacked him upside his head. "OW, I'M NOT INTO THAT KIND OF STUFF. GO BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE!" He continued to

scream and she just smirked. "Listen Sasuke, I'm not Karin I'm Haya." I said calmly smiling, Sasuke shook his head in disbelief. "You're not Haya, she doesn't wear glasses especially

those thick rimmed ones!" I shook my head then took my glasses off staring at him with my blurry vision, his eyes widened as he realized I was telling the truth. "I didn't know you wear

glasses, so the whole time you were wearing contacts before?" Sasuke asked calmly looking back over to the screen, Gaara completely into the movie didn't even know what was going

on around him. I sighed walking out of the room and going into the kitchen to finish helping Sai, to my surprise he had added the eggs and the oil. "Hey Haya I added the

eggs and the cooking oil like the box said." He said smiling another genuine smile for the second time, he then noticed something different about me. "I like your glasses, you look really..."

He stopped mid sentence turning his face and going to the refrigerator to get the butter. He handed me the stick of butter trying his best not to make eye contact with me, completely

oblivious I took the butter got a bowl out the cabinet put the butter in the bowl then shoved into the microwave and I put it on full blast. About 2 minutes later the microwave beeped

then I took the now brunt butter and poured it into the cake mixture in the bowl, Sai smiled as I handed him the whisk he carefully started stirring the cake. "I feel silly doing this..." He

said as he continued stirring the cake, "why do you feel silly?" I asked him as I sprayed the cake pan with Pam spray. "Well it's just I was doing a lot of thinking and well um..." Sai's face

unintentionally turned red as Naruto came running into the living room which happened to joined to the kitchen, "It's on, Saw V is on!" Naruto said changing the channel to the horror

channel flopping on the couch that Yamato was previously sitting on, Sai quickly put the cake in the pan and I placed the pan in the oven setting the timer for 25 minutes, Gaara and

Sasuke came running into the living room and hopped onto the couch. I smiled as I followed behind Sai and we squeezed our way on the couch, Sasuke was on the left end Naruto on

the right end Gaara next to Sasuke, Sai next to Naruto and me in the middle of Sai and Gaara. I watched the screen intently but as the gory scenes came on I screamed and buried

my face in Gaara's shoulder as I squeezed Sai's hand. "I'm going to make some popcorn." Sasuke said getting up walking over to the cabinet and reaching for 2 bags of microwave

popcorn. I looked up at the screen and went back to watching the movie, when the scary part came on this time I laid my head on Sai's shoulder which caused him to blush a

little. Sasuke then came back with two bowls of popcorn along with some powdered cheese seasoning for the popcorn, man this apartment has everything.

**

* * *

**

**~The Airport at Konoha ~ **

Pein was at the ticket desk getting 12 plane tickets to Forks, Washington. Itachi and Deidara was signing autographs apparently the teens of Konoha are AFI fans

(Itachi was Davy and Deidara was Jade), Zetsu was fending off boys as he was still disguised as Haya, Kisame and Zabuza were talking about old times, Konan was

showing Haku how to make a origami bunny, Hidan and Kakuzu were disguised as male models, Hidan a Scandinavian model and Kakuzu a Russian model **(AN: priceless -**

**falls on the laughing)** and Tobi was well being Tobi except he was disguised as Justin Biber **( AN: So fitting riiight? anywho I'll shut up now)**. All of the little girls who attended

the Konoha academy were chasing him, "Tobi..I mean Justin is a good boy!" Tobi said running for dear life away from the future kunoichi of Konoha, to think a 90 something Uchiha

male running away from prepubescent young girls, wow Madara/Tobi must have a soft spot for kids. 25 minutes later everyone boarded the plane and found their assigned seats,

the airplane pilot then spoke. "Hello this is your captain, Kakashi Hatake here and the flight will now take off." "What the hell, since when can that prick Kakashi fly a plane?" Zabuza

freaked out as he folded his arms, Pein was sitting next to Konan holding her hand when Sasori had to speak up. "What are we going to do in this place, where are we going to work?"

Pein rubbed his temples then handed everyone except Zabuza and Haku a folder, the folder contained different jobs especially for each member. One by one each Akatsuki member

opened their envelope and they eyes widened in shock. "You have got to be kidding me?" Sasori said failing miserably to keep up his emotionless facade. "I'm going to teach shop

class at a high school!" Sasori said. "It's not that bad danna I'm going to be teaching art, un." Deidara said smiling happily. "Well I'm the f****ng school principal, ain't that f****ng

great?" Hidan said sarcastically rolling his eyes. "I'm the biology teacher..." Zetsu said flatly. "English teacher..." Itachi said. "School security officer. And she's the school nurse." Pein

said pointing to Konan. "Woohoo I'm the school's treasurer." Kakuzu said grinning ear to ear. "Tobi is the guidance counselor! Tobi will help with counseling!" Tobi said excitedly.

"You guide teenagers! You can't even guide yourself out of a candy store, un!" Deidara said causing everyone to burst out laughing. "You dumb little S**t shut up, Kakashi is

flying this plane remember..." Hidan said sighing. Pein thought about it for about a second, "on second thought Deidara maybe you can just be a student instead, the world is

not ready for your high class talent." Pein said trying his best to use reverse psychology on the teen clay terrorist, everyone then nodded their heads in agreement for the fact Forks

high school... hell no high school is not ready for that type of 'art'. "Yo, dawg what about me and Haku yo?" Zabuza asked crossing his arms, Haku completely engrossed in the origami

bunny to pay attention. "Go get a job at the hospital as security or something I don't care and Haku can go to school like everyone else!" The pieced up fire hair colored leader said

rubbing his temples. Everyone then averted their attention to Kakuzu awaiting for his complaints about his 'job'. "What I said I was the school treasurer, I get to handle money."

He said shrugging his shoulders, everyone shaking their head then fixing their attention back at Pein. "So where are we going to be staying at?" Kisame asked still reading over

his assigned job description. "By the way Sushi what did you get?" Hidan asked trying to look over at Kisame's folder only to find Mr. Sushi's hand covering the title. "Why should I

tell you, it's not important and another thing only Haya can call me Sushi." Kisame said crossing his arms with the folder in his hands, Pein narrowed his eyes at the two then sighed.

"Kisame is the P.E. teacher, will everyone pl.." Pein in my arse was about to finish his sentence when all of a music video of Micheal Jackson's Beat It came on the in-flight movie

screen, Sasori's mouth dropped as he watched the screen in utter shock. "Why the f**k is Orochimaru dancing and singing..." Hidan asked not looking away from the screen,

everyone else nodded as they couldn't take their eyes off the screen. If they only knew that it was Micheal Jackson not Orochimaru those poor misguided fools.

**

* * *

**

**~Back with Naruto and the gang~**

"Do you guys smell something burning?" Naruto asked not averting his attention away from the telly, Sasuke got up and walked over to the oven to check on the cake.

Socks-gay tried to pull the oven open but it would not budge, the oven started smoking as the cake began to burn up, "A little help here guys!" Sasuke said as he called

over his shoulders, Naruto got up walked over to Sasuke giving him a crazy stare, "it's just a oven, it shouldn't be that hard to open." Then our favorite blonde kitsune tried

to pull on the oven and to his surprise it still wouldn't budge, "I told you dobe that the oven wouldn't open..." Sasuke stated rolling his eyes, "shut up teme and just pull!"

Naruto said in a grunting effort to pull the oven open, I looked over at the two and got up to see what was going on. Gaara and Sai got up as well to see what was going on,

Naruto then backed away from the oven and whipped out his cellphone and dialed 911, "Help Help its a emergency, its a-...Yes I'll hold." Naruto held the phone waiting for twenty

minutes for the emergency dispatcher to get back on the phone. "Hello 911 what is ya'll's emergency?" The female dispatcher asked boredly, "HELP HELP OUR APPARTMENT IS ON FIRE

DATTEBAYO!" "Calling 911 fer pranks er not funny young man, where er ya'll's parents?" The southern sounding female dispatcher said, "I'M NOT PRANK CALLING OUR APPARTMENT IS

ON FIRE!" "Surrrrrrre yer not kid," with that the dispatcher hung up. "Oh shoot, what do we do now?" Naruto asked scratching his head sweatdropping as he looked at the group nervously,

the smoke detector then started beeping as the stove blew up...wait a second BLEW UP? The pieces of the stove started flying everywhere and one large piece just missing Gaara hitting

me on my forehead, I was quickly knocked out and I fell to the floor before anybody could catch me...stupid guys. Sasuke not even noticing me ran out of the appartment to go to the front

desk...some brother he is, Gaara then noticed my comatose body and picked me up carrying me bridal style as Sai and Naruto was behind him running like the way a person would run at

a 50% sale at Wallmart. They then ran down the four flights of stairs and left out through the emergency exit, as soon as they got outside the fire department, the police department including

the chief of police Charlie Swan, the camera crew and the producer of the show all stared at the building in amazment and whistled as the whole building caught on fire and burned to the

ground. "You have got to be kidding me, I freaking called 911 and the dispatcher lady didn't believe me and you guys are here just staring at the building...do your freaking job and put that

fire out!" Naruto screamed to the top of his lungs his face turning red with furry in the process, Sasuke walks over to where the gang was only to see his sister's unconcious body in Gaara's

arms. "I'm such a terrible brother, somebody please get an ambulance...my sister is dead!" Sasuke screamed out as he began tugging on his hair, Sai arched an eyebrow staring at Sasuke

in disbelief. "She is not dead you duck haired homo, she was hit in the head then she blacked out..." Sai said in a emotionless tone still glaring at Sasuke, Yamato then walked over to

his 'kids', "I'll take this from here guys." He said as he pulled out a walkie talkie, "I have a unconcious female minor here at the new Forks Luxeury Appartments and condos, I need

someone right away." He then put the walkie talkie back in his pocket, the fire department, police and the film crew were sill staring at the burning building which was now a pile of ash,

they then clapped their hands then the fire department and the entire police department got into their respectable vehicles then took off. The show's producer walked up to Yamato

and shook his hand then handed him a map, "this is the house where you guys are going to be staying." He then looked over at Gaara who happened to still be holding Haya, "sorry

about her, no one wasn't supposed to be hurt but oh well see you guys at the mansion." The producer then pulled his Iphone and started chatting on it, Sai arched one eyebrow as he

stared at the producer who currently had his back turned. "Isn't he Johnny Knoxville from Jackass?" Sai asked out loud, Naruto looked over at him then nodded his head, "that's why the building

burned up and no one did nothing!" Naruto said now finally realizing everything as it clicked into place, the ambulance finally pulled up and the paramedics pulled out the stretcher Yamato walked over

to them and pointed them to where Haya was at. One of the paramedics who was a female turned her attention to Gaara and squeeled in delight when she saw him, "Oh my gosh I love your costume

you look just like Gaara from Naruto. Is that a real tattoo, can I have a picture and are you guys going to be going to Fork's High School?" She asked squealing and jumping up and down obviously a

fangirl, Gaara was in to much of a shock to answer so Naruto decided to speak up or in this case mess things up. "Yep its a real tattoo, he's dressed up like Sasuke and he's dressed like Sai and yes

we start Monday!" Naruto said smiling the girl then adverted her eyes to Haya, "she looks just like him..." She said pointing to Sasuke, Naruto then scratched his head and gave one of his goofy

bright smiles. "She's Sasu- I mean she's Chase's twin sister Nikki, he's Taylor he's Nolan and I'm Cody! Please to meet you what's you-" He said pointing to Sai and Gaara, he was about to ask the

paramedic girl her name but Yamato cleared his throat then gave both Naruto and the girl his trademark scary face. "EEEEKK!" Naruto and the paramedic girl screamed hugging each other teeth

chattering. "Wow he's scary just like Captain Yamato from Naruto." The girl said still hugging Naruto, while everyone was acting silly Gaara had handed Haya to the other paramedic and they then put

her on the stretcher. "We need a parent for her being that she is a minor, where is her parents?" One of the paramedics said, Yamato then raised his hand. "I'm her father as well as theirs..."

Yamato said pointing to Sai, Naruto, Gaara and Sasuke, "I will go with her since I'm off the clock until 11 tonight." One of the paramedics looked at him inquizitively, "I didn't know you had kids chief,

you look so young..." The other female paramedic if one wasn't thinking one would say Shizune! He laughed nervously then scratched his head, "well their adopted and I'm 28, we really should get

her to the hospital though..." The two paramedics loaded the stretcher into the ambulance and they then grabbed the Naruto fangirl paramedic and they climbed into the ambulance. "Come on you

guys are coming with me." Yamato said signaling for Naruto, Sai, Sasuke and Gaara to come along. They all climbed into the ambulance and with that the ambulance took off to the Forks hospital.

* * *

**Haya's mom Yoko: Sasuke have you seen Haya? -looks around frantically-**

**Sasuke: nope haven't seen her Yoko (sasuke didn't have the heart to tell her what really happened)**

**Yoko: -eye twitches- you are under my roof and Haya is your sister and you will call me mom or mommy! -takes a gun of of her weapons pouch and levels it at Sasuke's head-**

**Sasuke: -sweats nervously- yes mommy **

**Naruto: wow do I say the same thing? -stares at the gun- and shouldn't you be at the shooting range...?**

**Yoko: you can if you want to Naruto, by the way we're having pizza tonight -disappears in a cloud of smoke-**

**Temari: I will be the host of this show until my future sister-in-law gets out of the hospital and if anyone has a problem with it they can take it up with me -cracks knuckles-**

**Sai: I'm not going to say anything...-cough cough- ugly ho -cough-**

**Temari: What did you just say?**

**Sai: I d-didn't say a-anything... -sweatdrops then smiles his trademark fake smile-**

**Zetsu: I'm going to the hospital to visit Haya, you people are crazy! -storms off-**

**Gaara: me too.. -follows behind Zetsu- **

**Sai: Don't leave me here with this ugly ho!**

**Temari: thats it! -grabs Sai by his collar then drags him into the other room-**

**Sai: help me! -Screams over loud punches-**

**Temari: Call me a ugly ho again! -shireks from the other room-**

**Deidara: I'm just going to shut the camera off now, see ya guys -shuts the camera off-**


End file.
